Saturday, March 12, 2011

Really? With Apologies to Saturday Night Live

Do you remember the segement during Weekend Update on Saturday Night Live where Seth Meyers and Amy Pohler would rant about things? They would always preface their rants with the word "Really." Well, I am no where near as clever as those two but I'd like to get a few things off my chest. Here we go:

Girl Scouts? Really? I spent $4.00 on the tiniest box of Thin Mints in the world. Look, I appreciate your cause and know that selling cookies is a completely thankless way to earn money for all the other things you do but ripping me off? Really? I had to buy cookies because my Goddaughter was selling them, but due to the massive price of your cookies I only bought Thin Mints. The three other people in my house are nuts for them but it obviously wasn't worth it because apparently you forgot to add MOST OF THE COOKIES to the sleeve!! I was thinking about getting a box of Samoas, my favorite cookie,  from some local girls but once I saw you were skimping on the cookies, I changed my mind. REALLY?

My Internal Clock. Really? You don't work during the week when I have to get out of bed at 6am but on Saturday, the day I can sleep in as long as I want, you wake me up at...wait for it... 6am. No, really, I love getting up for no apparent reason and not being able to get back to sleep. Really?

Charlie Sheen Fascination. Really? This is a guy who is clearly mentally ill in addition to having a brain fried by drugs and he needs serious help. What does the general public do instead? Exploit the ever living mess out of the situation with programs, interviews, apparel, Twitter hashtags, etc. I know he is a grown man and I know that he is putting himself out there but the glee everyone has over his struggles is nauseating. Let's not forget that he has four really small kids who are going to have a more difficult life because of this. C'mon people, really?

TV News. Really? It isn't bad enough that Japan is going through something horrible right now- what with the massive earthquake, tsunamis and now nuclear reactor explosions- you have to try to make it more sensational? The pictures speak for themselves, we don't need to hear the anchor using his scary voice in an effort to ratchet up the pain. It's just so sad. Really.

Kids Channel Programmers. Really? Can you not play the male enhancement, Old Navy half naked guy, Axe body spray with the guys getting attacked by girls, et al commercials in the middle of the day while my kids are watching "Spongebob"? I am not a prude but there are some channels that should be sacred. Really.

That's all I have for right now but I am sure that something will annoy or disturb me enough that I'll find myself saying, quite loudly, "Really???"

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